Dick Types Ceramic Coasters | Funny Penis Art | Adult Humor Gift | LGBTQ+ Home Decor | Handmade DC

😏 Your coffee table has been too tasteful for too long.

Ten anatomical varieties, each with an irreverent name and zero shame, rendered in clean line art on high-gloss ceramic. Cheeky, conversation-starting, and guaranteed to make at least one guest choke on their drink.

Color-customizable and far more interesting than whatever you're using now.

🍸 Buy any 4 coasters, get $4 off — mix and match designs across the shop; the discount comes off automatically at checkout.

🎨 Color Selections — Read Before Adding to Cart

Pick a Color Design or Color Design / Color Coaster variant and two text fields appear right on this page — type your line art / design color and coaster background color before adding to cart. No emails, no waiting. Choosing Black Design / White Coaster? You're set — skip the boxes.

Need help picking? I use Coolors.co for palettes — generate a scheme, browse trending combos, or just type a vibe in the box and I'll run with it.

The Lineup

• 🍌 #1 Banana — Curved, confident, and gone slightly soft by Thursday. Photographs well, bruises easily.
• 💘 #2 Boyfriend — Reliable, a little needy, shows up exactly when you'd stopped waiting. The one you'd bring home to the group chat.
• 🍾 #3 Champagne Cork — Festive, celebratory, and over before you've finished pouring. Anticlimactic by design.
• 🎯 #4 Javelin — Built for distance, aimed with intent, and absolutely going to put someone's eye out. Olympic ambition.
• 🍄 #5 Mushroom — Top-heavy and thriving in the dark. Forager's choice. Possibly hallucinogenic, definitely a conversation.
• ✏️ #6 Pencil — Long, precise, erasable if things go sideways. The intellectual of the set. Brings notes.
• 👑 #7 Prince Charming — Storybook proportions, suspiciously perfect, almost certainly fictional. You'll meet him in a dream and never again.
• 🔺 #8 Pyramid — Broad foundation, tapered ambition, built to outlast a civilization. The ancients knew.
• 🌲 #9 Tree Trunk — Wide, grounded, and not remotely to scale. Old growth. Protected by at least one local ordinance.
• 🧀 #10 Wedge — Stout, dependable, unbothered by your expectations. Pairs well with lemon, lime, and low standards.

🛠️ Product Details

• Material: High-gloss ceramic tile with cork backing
• Size: 4" — circle or square ceramic tile
• Print Method: Dye sublimation — permanently heat-infused, vibrant, scratch-resistant, fade-proof
• Care: Wipe clean with a damp cloth. Heat-resistant for hot and cold drinks. Not dishwasher or microwave safe.
• Handmade in Washington, DC 🏛 — made and packed by one person, never factory-printed. Small variations are part of the process.
• LGBTQ+ owned & operated

📬 How Ordering Works

1. Order — Pick your design, shape, and (for color versions) colors right on this page.
2. Received & confirmed — I get your order and confirm everything's clear. If anything's missing, I'll reach out.
3. Made to order, by hand — printed, pressed, and quality-checked just for you. Current production time is 2–3 business days.
4. Approval photo (optional) — want eyes on it before it ships? Just ask. Skip it if you'd rather be surprised.
5. Shipped — packed by hand and on its way, with tracking.

✦ Perfect For

• 🎁 The friend whose group chat has no boundaries and somehow even fewer coasters
• 🖤 A coffee table that's been tasteful for far too long
• 🥂 Bachelorette parties, gag gifts, and housewarmings for people with a sense of humor
• 😏 Anyone who thinks "subtle" is a personal failing

👀 Pairs With: Tata Taxonomy Coasters · Kinky Keychains · Male Underwear Model Coasters

🛒 Looking for a different design? Browse the full collection →

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I customize the colors?
Pick a "Color Design" or "Color Coaster" variant and two text fields appear on this page — type your line art color and coaster color before adding to cart. Want help? Type a vibe and I'll choose.

Circle or square?
Your call, same price. Pick the shape at checkout.

Can I order the full set?
Please do. Add four or more and the buy-4-save-$4 discount comes off automatically — a complete taxonomy is a statement and a frankly elite gift.

Are these appropriate for all ages?
Absolutely not. Adult humor, full stop. Know your audience.

What if something arrives damaged or wrong?
Message me with a photo and I'll make it right.

WICKED WICKS AND MORE · HANDMADE IN WASHINGTON, DC · STAY WICKED.